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Love 2.0: Finding Happiness and Health in Moments of Connection, by Barbara Fredrickson
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We all know love matters, but in this groundbreaking book positive emotions expert Barbara Fredrickson shows us how much. Even more than happiness and optimism, love holds the key to improving our mental and physical health as well as lengthening our lives.
Using research from her own lab, Fredrickson redefines love not as a stable behemoth, but as micro-moments of connection between people—even strangers. She demonstrates that our capacity for experiencing love can be measured and strengthened in ways that improve our health and longevity. Finally, she introduces us to informal and formal practices to unlock love in our lives, generate compassion, and even self-soothe.
Rare in its scope and ambitious in its message, Love 2.0 will reinvent how you look at and experience our most powerful emotion.
- Sales Rank: #201335 in eBooks
- Published on: 2013-01-24
- Released on: 2013-01-24
- Format: Kindle eBook
Review
“Read this book and you’ll never think about love in the same way again!”—Sonja Lyubomirsky, Ph.D., author of The How of Happiness and The Myths of Happiness
“A radically new conception of love.”—The Atlantic
“Barbara Frederickson drives home the value of being warmhearted, making the scientific case that this variety of positivity benefits our health and our connections, as well as opening our live to new possibilities. Love 2.0 is a user-friendly manual for opening our hearts.”—Daniel Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence
“Barbara Fredrickson offers up nothing short of a revolution in Love 2.0….This line of work may end up changing both what we mean by love and what we take as evidence for love and its effects.”—Los Angeles Review of Books
“No current book can hold a candle to Fredrickson’s Love 2.0 for its stunning combination of science, wisdom and poetry. I am tempted to say that there has not been a better book on love since the New Testament.”—George Vaillant, M.D., author of Spiritual Evolution and Triumphs of Experience
“Fredrickson is disassembling centuries of other notions of what love is, how to receive it, how to give it, and why it is so important in distinguishing humans from other mammals on earth.”—National Post
“A remarkable book on the supreme emotion called love, this beautiful volume captures the essence of love, in life, in science, between us, within us. Love has never been so well understood, so deeply expressed, as in the work of scientist Barbara Fredrickson.”—Joan Halifax, author of Being with Dying
"In this book, Barbara Fredrickson conveys a powerful new view of what we all want most deeply--love. Using rigorous science, practical exercises, and heartful daily life examples, Barbara shows us how to strengthen our capacity to more truly connect to ourselves and others. Love 2.0 moves the entire field of understanding and accessing love forward."—Sharon Salzberg, author of Lovingkindness and Real Happiness
“I’m in love with Love 2.0.”—Parents
"Lest this sound too “new age” to you, be prepared to have all of these exercises backed up by scientific evidence of their effectiveness. Fredrickson is, above all, a researcher. She assures her readers that what she is suggesting is “evidence-based” and is meant to increase loving feelings from the inside out, not to make people put on fake smiles or pretend to feel something they don’t. It’s this promise—and the science behind it—that makes Love 2.0 rise above other self help books."—Greater Good
‘This book may change your life. Really. Give Love 2.0 a chance.”—New Scientist
“What a wonderful book! Not only has Barbara Fredrickson dared to say that love is the most supreme among all emotions, but she offers a wealth of scientific evidence and inspiring stories demonstrating that affective resonance is a key factor for our happiness and that of others. This is a must-read for all those interested in psychology, health, longevity…and above all a meaningful life.”—Matthieu Ricard, author of Happiness and Why Meditate?
"Fredrickson shows us many more avenues of affection than just finding our one true love."—Mindful Magazine
“Barbara Fredrickson puts a new twist on love, illuminating how we can transform our lives by extending love to all of humanity - including ourselves. Based on solid research yet written in an easy-to-read manner, this book is full of practical exercises that can help the reader learn how to love more fully.”—Kristin Neff, Ph.D., author of Self-Compassion
"Love 2.0 [is] a fine addition to [the] essential books on the psychology of love."—Maria Popova, Brain Pickings
“At last we can discuss the science of love. We can discuss the hormones involved, the way positive emotions can be strengthened, the relation between self-love and loving others. In this highly readable book, Barbara Frederickson offers expert guidance in this emerging field.”—Frans de Waal, Ph.D., author of The Age of Empathy
“Love 2.0 wakes us up to new possibilities from everyday connections. Barbara Fredrickson transforms how we view love….She expands possibilities of how to put more love moments in our lives, helping each of us to unlock resources that generate health, well-being and happiness for ourselves and for others.”—Jane Dutton, Ph.D., author of Energize your Workplace
About the Author
Barbara Fredrickson, Ph.D., is the author of Positivity. She is Kenan Distinguished Professor of Psychology and director of the Positive Emotions and Psychophysiology Laboratory at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill.
Most helpful customer reviews
110 of 112 people found the following review helpful.
transformative ideas
By Todd B. Kashdan
To me, Barbara Fredrickson is one of the best psychological researchers around. She is bold, changing the way people think about positive emotions. She is creative, designing strategies for manipulating seemingly abstract concepts such as love, agile thinking, resilience, and personal growth in the laboratory. She is tuned into the real world, trying to unravel what human beings really care about. And so it comes to no surprise that this book is incredible. It will change the way people think about love. She alters the timescale of love. Instead of limiting love to a small number of profoundly intense relationships where our innermost sense of self feels cared for, accepted, and validated by another person, she defines love by those "micro-moments" when we feel connected to another human being with a sense of vitality, deep affection, and there is a mutual investment of attention and respect. This new conceptual model of love changes the way we think about social interactions and relationships. Love becomes a renewable, endless resource. We can tap into it at any time by changing the episodes in our daily life. Instead of viewing relationships as healthy or problematic, we can think about the proportion of time spent together where positivity resonates. A binary world is traded in for the dynamic, complex moments that are the building blocks of a pleasurable, meaningful life.
This new model of love is certain to be controversial and highly debated.
And that is the sign of an author who pushes boundaries.
Barbara shares the rigorous scientific research that led to her ideas about love.
She also offers a number of strategies for the reader to cultivate more frequent and intense loving episodes.
Yes, the title is horrendous. But ignore it because underneath the cover is a new perspective at viewing your life and relationships. In my dream world, all scientists are as innovative and lucid as Barbara....
cheers,
Todd
44 of 44 people found the following review helpful.
Love and health co-create each other
By Film Fan
This important and intriguing book inspired several of my professional coach friends and I to create an ad hoc book club just so we can discuss it. The book has also inspired me to conduct an experiment on myself using the book's concepts and exercises.
The most important ideas, based on scientific research, that I've gained from Love 2.0, are:
1. There is a critical relationship between "vagal tone" (which we can influence), and our health and experience of love.
2. Love literally makes people healthier.
3. Our brains broadcast everything we feel to every part of of us, creating health or illness and rendering us more or less equipped for love.
4. Loneliness = inflammation in the immune system.
5. Lack of love in your life is more damaging to your health than smoking, drinking too much alcohol or being obese.
6. We give health to others when we engage with them with "positivity resonance" so every interaction with others is an opportunity for both of us to thrive more.
The author provides many suggestions for exercises to increase your experience of "positivity resonance" (and thus health and well-being), some of which have been used in research her team has done. I can't wait to try these out myself and suggest them to my coaching clients, as well.
86 of 93 people found the following review helpful.
An impressive book for many reasons
By rlweaverii
Book review by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.
This is an impressive book for a number of reasons. First, Fredrickson cites 228 footnotes in 192 pages of text--more than one per page. These are not lightweight sources. Most are from scholarly journals such as the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, the Journal of Marriage and Family, Cognition and Emotion, or American Psychologist---you get the picture.
A second reason why this is an impressive book has to do with the author's credentials. Fredrickson is the Kenan Distinguished Professor of Psychology and Director of the Positive Emotions and Psychophysiology Laboratory at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. She earned her undergraduate degree from Carleton College and her Ph.D. from Stanford University. She is a leading scholar within social psychology, affective science, and positive psychology and has received more than 10 consecutive years of research funding from the National Institute of Mental Health. Her research and teaching have been recognized with numerous honors, including, in 2000, the American Psychological Association's Templeton Prize in Positive Psychology, and in 2008, the Society for Experimental Social Psychology's Career Trajectory Award. It is a very impressive vita and adds tremendous credibility to her ideas.
The third reason why this is an impressive book is the fact that you really get a close-up and personal look at the kind of research she and her colleagues do. If you enjoy reading books that are deeply entrenched in significant, worthwhile, and results-oriented research, this is an excellent one. Of course, when your book depends on research from your own lab, this would be a natural and expected outcome.
The fourth reason why this is an impressive book is Fredrickson's writing. She uses the language effectively, and writing for the general public, it is accessible and enjoyable. I will cite just one sentence (one that I just love!) to give you an example: "Through the mere act of ranking others [she is talking here about making social comparisons], greed slithers in to create a false social topography that utterly denies the inherent sameness and oneness across all people" (p. 140). Not just any author can put words together so effectively.
The fifth reason why I found this book impressive is her list of "Recommended Readings." Although there are only thirteen books listed, the choices are truly outstanding. I wish the list had been much longer. To suggest that readers read Barbara Ehrenreich's Bright-Sided: How the Relentless Promotion of Positive Thinking Has Undermined America (NY: Metropolitan Books, 2009) is an excellent one. I loved Ehrenreich's book, and you can read my review of it at Amazon.com.
There is a sixth reason I liked this book, too. It is the practical nature of her work. Many of the ideas Fredrickson writes about are subjective--often ephemeral--in nature. But she concretizes them for readers by providing specific, well-described, tangible methods to experience them, get in touch with them, analyze them, and evaluate them. At times, this book almost becomes as much a workbook as an idea book. Also, the numerous examples she uses throughout the book have the same effect; they bring her ideas down to reality and allow readers to relate directly to them.
A seventh reason why I liked this book may not relate at all to many who read this review. I am always on the lookout for information I can use (after gettsing permission, of course) in my college textbook, Communicating Effectively, 10e (McGraw-Hill, 2012). Let me offer you two examples of material I located in Fredrickson's book. The first has to do with the relationship of love to nonverbal communication:
"Love . . . is characterized by four distinct nonverbal cues. The first cue, not surprisingly, is how often you and the other person each smile at each other, in the genuine, eye-crinkling mannter. A second cue is the frequency with which you each use open and friendly hand gestures to refer to each other, like your outstretched palm. . . . A third cue is how often you each lean in toward each other, literally bringing your hearts closer together. The fourth cue is how often you each nod your head, a sign that you affirm and accept each other" (p. 69).
The second example of material I located in Fredrickson's book that I may use in the new edition of my college textbook is a description of what it means to be wise. Now I cannot write out the entire description because it is fairly lengthy for this review, but here are the first two sentences: "Imagine having at your fingertips all the knowledge and experience to allow you to properly discern which of the many paths ahead of you to take. Imagine how it would feel to so readily grasp just the right thing to do and the right way to do it" (p. 81). If you think of beginning college students reading this, you can see its relevancy.
There are other reasons why I liked this book, but you get the point. I have not read her previous book, Positivity (Three Rivers Press, 2009), but based on what I found here--the great treasure I discovered--I will look forward to reading it.
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